After having our licenses for nearly a year, as somewhat experienced drivers, we viewed ourselves queens of the road. Although queens demand respect from their subjects, we did not receive such decorum, and were shocked to discover that not all drivers are courteous when their day is interrupted by a slow driver or a near-accident.

The realization that we were not sole rulers of the road, as well as that everyone thinks they are driving monarchs too, quickly crashed into our lives ? much like a car.

Less than two days apart, we both experienced the full effect of road rage when an innocent mistake was made. Though one experience in a parking lot and the other at an uncontrolled left hand turn, both caused similar consequences.

We understand how degrading it feels when you are put down on the road.

Natalie: Melissa, could you please describe to us what happened on this humbling day?

Melissa: A few days ago, while driving down Bullard toward the freeway, I was late for an engagement party and was hurrying to find the church. Realizing that I had passed it, I merged into the left turn lane, and not remembering that it was uncontrolled, I turned in front of a large van. My heart began racing as I saw it in my rear-view mirror and realized I had no way to stop. The van skidded to a halt inches away from the left passenger door of my car.

Natalie: After this heart-racing incident, what was your reaction along
with the reaction of your fellow driver?

Melissa: After both coming to an abrupt halt in the middle of the the intersections, an instant wave of guilt rushed over me and I felt myself blush with embarrassment. I immediately stepped on the gas and continued just hoping to get away and it would be forgotten but to my dismay, I was followed!

Natalie: She followed you?

Melissa: Instead of stopping to turn into the church, I continued through the green thinking only of my survival, and the fact that I had to get away. My sudden panic caused me to keep driving several blocks out of my way, in order to escape the angry person stalking me!

Natalie: What happened after this?

Melissa: Well, when I stopped at a red light, the middle-aged lady pulled up next to me and motioned at me angrily. In a state of shock, I rolled my window down and humbly apologized. But instead of forgiveness, this apology was met with a hurl of enraged words and violent hand motions.

Natalie: How did it make you feel when you humbly apologized for your wrong doing and in return received insults?

Melissa: When she started yelling and cussing at me I got really frustrated. I felt attacked, and instead of being able to accept her criticism for my mistake, I drove away with my blood boiling.

Natalie: Why were you so angry?

Melissa: Though my mistake almost caused an accident, I did not feel as if I deserved the disrespect she gave me; but instead of yelling back I chose to smile and drive away.

Natalie: I have also endured an embarrassing situation on the road.

Melissa: What happened?

Natalie: My story is a little different than yours, because I was confronted with a nasty letter rather than a personal confrontation.

Melissa: What brought about the letter?

Natalie: A friend and I were on our way to church, when I realized that I was low on gas and would probably not be able to make it there and back. With this realization, I signaled my friend to pull over so that I could park and ride with her. I parked my car in front of a house, making sure that it was out of their way. When I returened two hours later to my surprise a letter lay on the seat of my locked car.

Melissa: What did it say?

Natalie: The letter said: “Do not park you car in front of our house, it is not a vacant parking lot. Next time you decide to sneak around and get into a friend’s car don’t park here. License number on camera.”

Melissa: After you were personally attacked, did this make you open to their advice or angry?

Natalie: Surprisingly, I was not angry, but I felt saddened by the lack of hospitality. Aren’t neighbors suppose to be the most hospitable people? The fact that in today’s society one cannot park their car in front of another house without an agitated reply was a sad awakening. I was mostly hurt by their words ? not embarassed, but hurt ? that they thought of me as a teenager sneaking around, when in reality I was attending church.

Melissa: What did you do in response to the letter?

Natalie: I turned the note over and wrote: “I am so very sorry to cause you an inconvience, my friend and I were on our way to church when I realized that I was low on gas, so I had to ride with her. God bless.”

Despite their rude response, I chose a gracious reply. I wish I could say I was genuinely sorry but in reality I was trying to kill them with kindness; I wanted to make them feel bad for the judgement they placed on me.

Both driving scenarios ended in frustration and hurt feelings, and left us wondering why people feel the need to react in such angry ways.

With the reactions we encountered, nothing but enraged thoughts were communicated, and no solution. Isn’t the point of making a mistake learning from it? After such a hostile confrontation, we were unwilling to learn because we did not want to surrender to their demands.

At the base of the issue we were unsure why the indignant pedestrians would react in such a rude way. If they were civil, our response to their frustration would have been different.

Because of their harsh reactions, we rejected the lessons that we should have learned. Though they did not treat us fairly, all we can do is to control our emotions and return their frustration with kindness.

Because of everyone’s separate lives, we have no idea the quality of day our so-called enemies have encountered. The reasons behind their rudeness could be due to a recent death in the family or any number of unfortunate circumstances. If we judge them by their harsh actions, we are, in reality, hypocrites.

We realized from this experience to be merciful, and use compassion to help defeat the vexed tempers. We could be used to change their bad day onto a good one, by simply shining a smile.

For more opinions on vehicular mishaps, read the March 11 article, ‘Wolves’ harass stranded teen or the March 4 article, or My fender-bender fears.