Throughout life, all people taste that sour flavor of loss in some way or another. This loss often leaves a gaping hole, a void so deep that it seems nothing could possibly fill the what was left there. And sometimes, that void, that hole, can never be filled.
The loss of things and possessions can be coped with easily, but what about relationships? What of our friends, our family, and our loved ones? These people cannot be replaced with someone else; their place cannot be filled with another. They touch and shape our lives in their own unique way, and the hole they leave when they are gone sometimes seems too great to live with.
How then do we deal with loss? Is there a secret remedy to cure it? Is there a way we can make it stop? No, as long as we love we will always feel loss. Should we then get rid of love to make the hurt stop? No, without love there is no life and nothing worth living for.
“Better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.” That old cliche rings some truth in its words. What quality of life would we, as human beings, live without love? Though the pain of loss seems too great to deal with, that pain eventually subsides. And when it does, the memory of the person becomes a sweet delight. Those bitter tears that roll down our cheeks eventually become tears of joy because the lost become a cherished memory. Honoring the departed starts as a heavy cross to bear, but the pain does mold into such tender sweetness.
The families and students at FC lost a good friend recently. Mr. Gilmore left a hole in the hearts of those he met, and he is sorely missed. Though his passing is a bitter pill to swallow, let us take time to remember all he had done for us. Let us grieve, but let us also cherish the memory of Mr. Ericlee Gilmore.
As we go through time of loss, we need to remember that coping with grief is a process that must be faced. Whether you’re retired or just starting out in high school — human beings from all walks of life can relate to the ways we react during grief.
“Better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.” That old cliche rings some truth in its words. What quality of life would we, as human beings, live without love? Though the pain of loss seems too great to deal with, that pain eventually subsides. And when it does, the memory of the person becomes a sweet delight. Those bitter tears that roll down our cheeks eventually become tears of joy because the lost become a cherished memory. –Rees Roggenstein
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, psychiatrist during the 1900’s, introduced the 5 stages of grief that all humans go through in order to cope with loss.
We start to isolate ourselves and deny that the situation even happened at all. Then, whether rational or not, our mind begins to feel anger. This anger can be directed towards a number of things, depending on the situation.
The third stage, bargaining, is when the person begins to hope that somehow they can undo the event or the grief. This stage often involves bargaining with one’s self in hopes of earning a longer, happier life.
The next stage, which many are familiar with, is depression. Throughout depression, the griever begins to realize the certainty of loss and question the purpose of life. Often times, living seems like a pointless process to the depressed.
The final, most satisfying stage, is acceptance. This is the point where the individual comes to terms with loss. They realize their mortality, and that loss is a healthy part of life. This stage usually stabilizes the grieving, and brings them to a calm phase.
Though there is no remedy, no miracle cure for loss, there is a way to accept it. Though the hole can never be filled, it can be learned to live with. The answer is time. With time, that once painful scar becomes a beautiful reminder of the love shared with that person.
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For more opinions, read the Sept. 19 article, Starting the school year off right.
