Perception. I find it intriguing that someone may be viewed differently by two humans. They are consistent in word and deed, as much as humanly possible, yet, one sees the good, the other the bad.

So who is to say which is right? Is one individual simply seeing the whole picture and the other a partial truth? To these people, the adjectives ‘good’ and ‘bad’ represent widely varying pictures.

Over the course of the past year, I have struggled to search for the truth that surrounds the people in my life. I needed to form my own conclusion in order to determine reality.

What is reality? According to Webster’s Dictionary, it is: ?the world or the state of things as they actually exist, as opposed to an idealistic or notional idea of them.?

Perception is not reality.

I have a friend who has said a few hurtful things, but I chose forgiveness because I see their heart. I chose to perceive their comments as unintentional.

The more time you spend with someone, the more you pinpoint their weaknesses. There comes a point in life where I ask myself, ?am I willing to accept this person?s faults and deal with the damage they might cause me or other people?? This is why perceptions change. We get tired of continually putting up with another person and decide we no longer enjoy their companionship. That’s life.

The concept of “truth” was hard for me to grasp. Who really is this ?he? or ?she?? Since the views of myself and others are continually molding, how is it possible to find out the quality of a human?

The thing is, people change, and when they change so does the gossip. It’s always shifting. It?s the root of all drama. One rude remark from a normally kind person can alter the recipient’s feelings toward that individual. They may think he or she is always insolent. Untrue.

Someone’s opinions of others should not be based on a few incidents or the beliefs of those who are likely to have biased views. I may never know if my resentment, either rational or irrational, may have completely alienated a friendship which had the potential to develop character.

So, to be honest, I think this issue is all about forgiveness and grace. Love is accepting people unconditionally, regardless of their faults.

Before I take a stance on the character of a human I have decided to consider this: perception is our opinion and therefore may be flawed. I must get the facts, and from the sources. Sources, you ask? Yes, I just brought the Bible into this.

I take my personal experiences with people and line it up to what the Bible outlines as truth. “Okay, they made a mistake today. . . were they sorry? Did they feel guilt? Are they attempting to change and conform to Christ?” If I can answer yes to these, it is then my decision is to extend forgiveness.

I honestly believe showing other believers’ grace is a fantastic example of the power of Christ. So, though it may be hard to let go of the past, it is what we are called to do. In cheesy terms, the ball is in your court. Personally, I just look forward to shaking hands with fellow players at the end.

For more columns, read the Feb. 16 article, Point one: Solutions to fueling our nation’s future.